Best possible news. The orthopedist says no surgery for now. He gave me two cortisone shots in the offending knee and told me I can start cycling again as early as Thursday of this week. As tempting as that is I will wait until Saturday and I have planned out a nice, relatively flat, very easy, 20-mile course. If in three weeks the knee is giving me any problems then we will look at surgery as the next best option. The doctor thinks that with my knee, the low-grade of the tears, it is possible, even probable, that surgery will not be needed. I couldn’t have hoped for a better outcome.
So I get to climb back on the saddle this weekend. I am ecstatic!
A little worried of course. Last time I rode the bike was June 30 and it didn’t turn out well. Great pain. So I am a little worried. I trust the Doctor. I am ready to ride. I am going to listen VERY carefully to whatever signals my knee sends my way. Missus has already been asked to wait for the rescue me phone call…
Missus is just hopeful that cycling again will restore my good humor. Seems I have been something of a grumpy so-and-so the last few weeks….
I have written about how important cycling is to me. It is the single exercise I enjoy most.. I like to walk. I like to hike. I love to cycle. There is something about the feeling of riding. It means more to me than I can say to know that I will be cycling on Saturday.
I am 211 pounds now. Many would say I can round off now. I am at my goal weight and for once I agree with playing silly with the numbers. I know that the last pound or two is all a matter of what did you eat today, how much have you had to drink? I feel like I have reached the goal but I am not going to celebrate or mark the occasion until I see 210 on the scale.
The next goal is 200 pounds. That is where I will stop. No more weight loss after that. That is where I want to stay. 200 pounds.
The idea that a man of 305+ pounds, with terrible fitness, exhausted by easy tasks, winded going up stairs, would now be 210 pounds, fit, nearly trim, with decent stamina….
I am going to say this: I did it because I finally understood that I had to do it. There would be no miracle weight loss drug, surgery, potion, balm, salve, prayer, incantation… I had to do it. I had to change my approach to food, the way I ate, what I ate, when I ate WHY I ate.
I am not done. I am not talking about the next ten pounds to come off. I am talking about the hard part of the Journey that is no set to begin. Keeping the weight off, keeping the fitness up, staying on the bike, continuing to walk, to hike, to eat right, sleep right, live right..
I know that it will be a fight. I have seen it in others, I have seen it in myself. Weight loss, proclamations of turning the corner, followed by a regaining of the weight.
I am determined that this will not be me.
I will continue to walk, to hike, to ride. I will continue to eat as I have been eating the last 7 months. Lots of greens, lots of squash, fish, poultry, a little rice, a little pasta, a bit of bread, sometimes some cheese. I will continue this because this is what brought me here. Nearly to my goal. Nearly 95.6 pounds down. I will not leave at the dance the partner that brought me here.
This is all about changing my life. It has always been about changing my life. Not just the FAT MAN part. It has been about learning to live within my skin. To be happy about who I am. This has not been an easy Journey and this part of the Journey, like the weight loss and maintenance part of the Journey, is nowhere near the end. IT never will be. I have spent a life time struggling with my demons. I expect most people fight some inner turmoil. I am learning just what those demons are and how to keep them under control. It is a something I wish I had learned 40 years ago. Such is life. It is never too late to get it all together.
The weight loss, the learning about myself, the return to cycling, to walking to hiking have all fed to one another. I could not return to the physical activities until I had lost a little weight. I could not start o lose the weight until I started to understand WHY I needed to lose the weight beyond the better health aspect of it all, and they all wrap around one another and they all support the other.
If this makes little sense to you don’t worry, it is just beginning to make sense to me.
I am so pleased to look at pictures of me now and see the trimmer me. I will say I am a very tough critic. I was looking at a picture of me taken this past weekend and I was upset with myself because of the love handles. I really need to stop doing that to myself..
SO back on the bike Saturday.