Where Have I Been
I haven’t posted since Sunday and I am sorry about that. I did have stuff to say but I have been going through an odd week. I have left my job of the past 14 months and I am happy about the new job starting in a couple of weeks and I am excited about the changes coming up but there is still a sense of unease that has kept me from sitting down and writing. My thoughts are just so jumbled.
This is an odd position to be in. I gave my notice, intending to work at the old company until this Friday but the company decided they would pay me for the week and good luck to me. The new job starts in two weeks and I have the knee surgery next week so all is OK with that. The odd thing is that one has to give notice while still awaiting the final approval on the hiring because they check with your current employer and they are doing the requisite background check. So stuff could go wrong (not anticipated) and I could end up with no source of income.
This would be bad.
So this is why I have not written anything since Sunday.
In baseball there is an expression: “The Mendoza Line”. The expression refers to hitting .200. If you are below .200 you are below the Mendoza Line. Bad in baseball…
Good for a 6-foot + formerly 300+ pound man. I
I have been hovering a couple of pounds above that line for a couple of weeks and finally got back below it yesterday. Makes me feel good that I am maintaining the weight at the 200 pound range, the Mendoza Line…
The habits I have worked to develop over the last 9+ months are showing through. I am not eating junk I once did, I don’t eat as much and I am eating a healthier diet. It is a wondrous thing to look in the mirror and see the person I am now. I used to look in the mirror and ask how I got where I was. I knew it intellectually, I couldn’t accept it emotionally.
I have worked hard to understand the emotional aspects of my weight issues. I have learned that food is solace for me. I also eat as refuge from stress. Related, I know.
The simple fact is there is no one trigger. There are many. Some of it is simply bad habit. I have to fight 50+ years of nibbling and gorging. And yes, I still have to fight it. The key is to never forget you are in a fight.
Buying GOOD New Clothes
Since I started this Journey I have been buying new clothes as I have shrunk out of one size after another. I started at XXL shirts and I am now a loose large. I started at a tight 46 waist (elastic waist, probably a 47-48) and I am now a comfortable 34 waist.
I have bought CHEAP all along the route because I didn’t want to buy GOOD clothes only to drop them off at Goodwill in a few weeks times. Now that I have stabilized at 200 pounds and the 34 waist I am buying “good” clothes. Eddie Bauer shirts, Levi Jeans, Dockers Chinos. These are clothes meant to last me years, not weeks. The shock is the price of good clothes. Oh well. Worth it because of what it represents.
I need to buy a new suit. I have nothing that fits. My best suit is now ridiculously large on me and that was my “thin” suit. Fortunately that jacket looks reasonable on me and I was able to disguise the fact that the pants are huge when I went on a recent job interview (I got the job). I cannot wear the suit again so it is time to crack open the wallet and buy a good suit.
Even my shoes need to be replaced. I went from a size 11.5 EE to an 11 D. Amazing that even the feet lost weight! I also shrunk from 73.5 inches to 73 inches. Boggles the mind but if the feet shrunk a size it stands to reason that I went down in height along with it….
So I bought a pair of Levi’s yesterday. First new pair I have had in many years. I love the way they fit. I have to say I am surprised by something. I don’t need a belt. I usually wear one but I don’t need it when wearing jeans. I haven’t quite figured it out. The jeans are comfortable, loose in the legs as I like them and not at all tight in the waist but they fit so well that a belt is extra…
I was looking at a picture of me from high school, the last time I was this lean, and I am not wearing a belt…
Good clothes. Clothes intended to last… I am really enjoying this part of the Journey.
Buying a Bike
It is year-end closeout time at the bike shops. The 2013 models are coming in and the 2012 models are in the way. Not a bad problem for a fellow like me. The 2013 models in my price range differ little from the 2012 models other than color and I am not much concerned with color. I have been riding a magenta bike for all these years after all. So the opportunity to buy a good bike at as much as 25% off is a good thing.
I am shopping around now and will soon actually make the purchase. Unless, yet again, I talk myself out of it, as I have done time and again. I think it is a must at this point really. Well not to spend the money this week but rather to replace the bike before the new cycling season next spring. Simple fact is this: at 20 years old my bike has given me all that it can. The frame has become somewhat springy, the components are worn out and getting ever more difficult to replace. My bike will never leave the household. I am not going to sell it or toss it or donate it… It will be my wind-trainer bike, my occasional nostalgic ride… But the time has come to look at a new bike and make the decision.
I have the choice down to three bikes and I am leaning heavily towards one of them. I would probably have bought it this weekend but I have decided to take a trip with the Younger instead. I am having knee surgery on Tuesday and starting a new job in two weeks and that will make trips like this a challenge until spring so we are going this weekend. I, being oblivious, didn’t realize it is Columbus Day weekend and could not understand why hotel rooms were 1) so hard to come by and 2) so expensive.
So I have a few more days, weeks even, to contemplate the purchase but I do have to be careful that my final choice isn’t sold out before I can buy it…
The difference 6 months makes.
I last took a trip with the Younger in March. I was a little over 270 pounds at the time and still learning about the plan and the Journey. I was happy to have dropped 35 pounds but I knew I had a long way to go. I was nervous every time we went in to a restaurant and I had trouble really enjoying the meals because of this. This time I am not faced with such issues. I am down 105+ pounds and I have learned how to handle meals out. This trip, in that regard, should be more enjoyable for me. It is always a good time with the Younger. He is every bit the 12-year-old but he is still fun.
I will certainly have more energy than I had in March. The days really exhausted me. This time I expect that I will be able to keep up with him a bit better. Actually, I think the question is: will he be able to keep up with me?!